i constantly look sleep deprived

A few weeks ago, I posted about a terrible time I had with my sister, my family, and some depression.
I am a twenty something student, getting my life back on track after a series of unfortunate events.
I haven’t updated in a while, and that’s due to my constant working.
I truly believe myself to be in a good place, and I’m happy.  I do constantly look sleep deprived, and that’s because I have a new job!  I work at a daycare in my town, I’m taking summer classes, and I even have my fall schedule booked and ready to go.

For the first time in a very long time, I am happy.  I feel like everything is going my way, and I couldn’t be more excited.  I am refreshed, I am ready for school, and I am honestly just happy.  I have my good days and my bad days.

The job at the daycare takes up most of my time, sadly, and I know I’ll have to find something new to do once schooling starts up.  I can’t work forty hours a week and still be a successful student taking sixteen hours, I truly won’t be able to do it.  I’ve tried before, and that ended up with me being hospitalized.  (yes, there were some other factors, but again, it was due to me stretching myself too thin among my responsibilities.)

I finally understand that it’s okay to be selfish and think about me for a while.  I don’t like saying, “no” or disappointing others, but I realize that I have a lot going for me, and I can’t throw it away just to make someone happy for a few hours.
I have a lot to offer the world, and I want to make sure I do what I can to succeed.
I am very excited about this whole college thing though.  I feel like I’m freshly 18 again, moving to college for the first time.  Obviously, I live at home with my parents, which is nothing to be embarrassed about.
When I first moved back, I was embarrassed, secretive, and just down right ashamed. (more to come about that later, as it’s a long story.)
I am content with where I am.  I am focusing on myself, I am taking care of myself, and I am truly healthy for the first time in a while.  I am healthy, mentally and physically.
I am ready to embark on this new adventure, and I’ll try to keep you lovelies updated as it goes.

As for now, I have to go to sleep.  I have to be awake and ready to take care of lil beebs for twelve hours tomorrow, in less than six hours.
Goodnight my lovelies, I hope you’re all doing well.


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