For reference, I’m 5’4.5″ (I won’t post weights for the obvious and not so obvious reasons.) On the left I was near my lowest weight and I always felt like shit.
On the right, well, I still feel like shit some days, but definitely not as much.
I’m surely healthier now, but that mentality isn’t something that will ever fully go away.
Do I look like I’ve gained 15-20 pounds?
Probably; I have boobs, I have an ass, and my thighs that I had been so self conscious of all those years are clearly bigger.
Do I feel like I’ve gained 15-20 pounds?
Yes, but I also know it was necessary.
The thing is, not many people see this huge difference that I see.
Sure, people can tell, but can they tell how many pounds I was obsessed over?
No one cares what your body looks like as nearly as much as you do.
Scales are stupid. Eating disorders are stupider.