i do not know what grey is.

1. I do not know what grey is. Everything I do is in black and white, and I will either love too much that I lose myself in your warmth, or too little that I am too cold to embrace.
2. I am a fire and I take more than I can ever give back to you. Don’t get too close to me, you will damage your skin from my touch and it will turn you into ash and dust.
3. My kisses are not long and sweet and they will not make you fall deeper in love with me.  They are short bursts of sadness landing along your neck and I’m sorry if they poison you.
4. I have too many words to say and I let them swim in the dark waters of my mind. I wish I could spill them all out, but whenever I try they’re drowning and I am already out of breath.
5. My flaws hide behind the irises of my eyes when they stare at you for too long and look away.  I’m worried you’d start to see me the way I see myself and decide that you don’t love me either.

– excerpt from a book I’ll never write

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